The Missed Connections of their time...

Does your mind ever get scrambled when you think of all there is to do in the world, both what you want to do and what you have to do? All the books you want to read, the sights you want to see, the places to go?

Like many book lovers, I have a TBR list I'm sure I won't finish even if I live to be 99. Whenever I think of all there is to do, especially the exciting things, I'm usually able to snap myself out of my funk.

I just downloaded The Agony Columns of The Times 1800-1870,free from my Google Play Books app. It's fascinating stuff and not only because it's reproduced exactly as it would have looked to 19th century readers but also because it's a collection of columns from what seem to be the Missed Connections of their time. The above is just one of many examples.

The "agony" is supposedly taken from the writer's despair of ever again seeing the person he (though sometimes women would post an ad) found so fascinating, though other ads are more laments or thinly veiled messages that hint at illicit affairs or something from a spy novel. 

Alice Clay's introduction to the book could have been written today it has such modern insight into the human heart. Just one of the passages from her intro:

With hearts that are breaking, men and women can go through the duties of every-day life, wearing calm and even smiling faces. He knew human nature well who wrote 'Broken hearts are dumb or smile.' What is there to tell us that such smiles are only on the surface?

But not all of the ads are missed connections of the first encounter kind. Many repeat names and are mysterious and signed in code. You'd need a degree in cryptology to decipher them.

In one striking ad, someone refers to Cenerentola and writes: Until my heart is sick, have I tried to frame an explanation for you, but cannot. Silence is safest if the true cause is not suspected: if it is, all stories will be sifted to the bottom. Cenerentola is Italian for Cinderella, but it (if you add a "La" in front) is also the name of a 19th century opera.

For a book having an editor, it doesn't offer much source material or any footnotes (marvelous introduction aside!) You have to figure out references and codes yourself (if the codes can even be cracked.)

Despite these problems, you can have fun looking up things or recognizing them because you already know some of the popular culture at the time. There is sadness yet familiarity and comfort in the general malaise of the human condition always present in The Agony Column. Take out the dates and the formal language and you could almost be reading the best of Craig's List.