Anyone who comes out to an ultra-conservative family member or friend (or reads the news on a daily basis for that matter) will tell you that she is no stranger to hearing "you're going to Hell if you do not change." There are days, though, when it feels like you're already there.
Your family won't accept you unless you "recant," some of your friends no longer want anything to do with you and, still in 2014, you see at least one article a day online (or in the paper) quoting a super-religious far right person comparing us to something loathsome.
Really, I can't honestly imagine Hell being any worse than being alone with your own thoughts at night, trying to negotiate with your own parents so that you can be someone they actually want in their home for the holidays. And, on top of that, knowing (true, there's no actual proof, but you can just feel it in your bones) that someone you truly admire no longer can even look at you because they find who you are so counter to their beliefs.
I want to say to people like Bruce Barron, "Please. Please. Stop saying your rights are infringed upon by my wanting to fall in love with, marry and grow old with another woman. You can believe whatever you want, you can even write a column about those beliefs, but you should not have the right to deny me or my hypothetical/imaginary/ hopefully future wife the right to marry or live where we want to."
It's exhausting to be this frustrated, even angry, and to have trouble letting go of all this angst. I think the holidays bring it out in me, that to be with my family for Christmas I have to be someone I'm not. Even worse, there is hardly a day goes by where I don't believe I am going to Hell.
I just want to add that I know I write about this issue a lot in my blog, but one reason I do is because of horrible things like this:
"We will fight these vermins called homosexuals or gays the same way we are fighting malaria-causing mosquitoes, if not more aggressively." — Gambian President Yahya Jammeh
Last Friday, a group of Gambian human rights activists supported by the RFK Center visited HRC's headquarters in Washington, DC and described atrocities going on in their country, many of which are carried out against LGBT people by the President of the Gambia, Yahya Jammeh – will you help put a stop to this?
Right now, Gambians are being imprisoned in deplorable conditions just because they are suspected of being lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender (LGBT). Some of these individuals have even been held for over a month without any contact with the outside world and have no access to a lawyer. It is believed that they are being tortured, and there is tremendous fear for their lives and their safety.- source: HRC, Human Rights Campaign
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