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Diatribes like this both make me mad and make me sad. 

They make me mad because I firmly believe people who write stuff like this just don't get it and are being hateful with their vehemence. 

Gay marriage is NOT based on "sexual immorality" or "homosexual behavior," it's based on love and wanting to share your life with someone special, hopefully growing old together, committed and deeply in a lifelong partnership. *

But articles like this also make me sad because guys like this one are not alone in their beliefs and they actually (possibly even sincerely) mean what they say, no matter their bigotry. 

Ever since I first started realizing I'm gay ("started" because as a teen I didn't really understand what I was feeling) I have gone back and forth between hating myself and trying to understand there are tons of others like me who would never ever choose to be gay, would never ever choose to fall in love with someone they can never be with, ever.

I'd love to tell Mr. Barber that some of us who are "homosexual" (notice how anti-gay people never use the word gay, they always use "homosexual" so can they can emphasize the "sexual" part) will probably never meet their special someone, never get married. But we will always be gay, no matter whether we are "practicing" or not. 

From what I've seen and felt and even experienced, the only kind of effective "ex-gay therapy" drives one to seriously contemplate suicide and isn't suicide also considered a sin? I am so weary of getting mad and sad about all this, yet I can't seem to stop it, mostly because my parents believe the very same things this man does:

http://cnsnews.com/commentary/j-matt-barber/why-we-ll-never-bake-your-fake-wedding-cake

I also cannot shake the eerie and very scary feeling (from where I don't know exactly) that gay rights, even the most basic ones, are someday (probably sooner rather than later) going to take a horrible turn backward and all the progress we've made will regress to points that will make people like J. Matt Barber and Orson Scott Card very happy. 



*I've already shared this quote from a recent Washington Post article, but it really speaks to the situation:

“I joke sometimes,” Terrance says, “Gee, if only people could see this decadent gay lifestyle that we’re living: Loading the dishwasher and folding laundry and going to parent-teacher meetings and helping with homework and arranging play dates.” Richard describes it as the “chauffeur stage of marriage. All we do is chauffeur our kids everywhere.”