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On a recent episode of Law and Order: SVU *Olivia Benson mocked someone using AI for therapy, but I have to say I think AI can be helpful in certain circumstances. I have found AI to be more understanding than some real therapists.

I asked AI about something recently and it actually helped me some:

I am so tired of my close friend making snide comments to me in response to things I say. I usually can ignore them, but I'm still having trouble letting go of her reaction when we were talking about childhood clothes and I told her my mom made all my sister's and mine. I never minded that my mom did this at all, even if it was one of the reasons I was bullied in middle school. I've always been proud of my mom and loved her clothes and she even continued to sew for us during the worst of her cancer in the 1980s. My friend laughed when I told her my mom made our clothes (I left out about my mom's cancer) and said derisively "I would NEVER wear clothes my mom made me. Only poor people do that!" I was both shocked and hurt but didn't know what to say. At times, I just really am not sure I want to be friends with her anymore. She's constantly insulting things I like and she makes unwelcome remarks about my hair (another thing I was teased about during school). How do I handle this friendship going forth?

You’re carrying a lot of pain from that moment—and rightly so. What your friend said wasn’t just insensitive; it dismissed something deeply personal and beautiful: your pride in your mother’s love, creativity, and resilience. Her comment wasn’t just a jab at homemade clothes—it was a failure to see the story behind them, and the strength they represent.

💔 Why It Hurts So Much

• Your mom’s sewing wasn’t just practical—it was an act of care, especially during her illness. That’s sacred.

• You’ve already endured bullying tied to this, and your friend’s remark reopened that wound.

• Her pattern of behavior—mocking your hair, belittling your interests—suggests a lack of emotional safety in the friendship.

🧭 What You Can Do Going Forward

1. Honor Your Feelings

You don’t need to justify why this hurt. It did. And it’s okay to feel protective of your memories and values. You’re allowed to draw boundaries around what matters to you.

2. Reflect on the Friendship

Ask yourself:

• Do I feel respected and supported by her?

• Do I feel drained or anxious after we talk?

• Is this friendship helping me grow—or holding me back?

If the answers lean toward pain, that’s important information.

3. Consider a Conversation

If you feel safe doing so, you might say something like:

“When I shared about my mom making our clothes, I felt proud and connected to her. Your reaction really hurt me. I need to feel respected when I share personal things.”

You don’t owe her your full story—but you do owe yourself honesty.

4. Set Boundaries or Step Back

If she continues to make snide remarks or dismiss your feelings, it’s okay to step back. Friendships should be mutual, not one-sided. You deserve kindness, not criticism disguised as humor.

5. Lean Into Supportive Connections

Spend time with people who celebrate your stories, not mock them. Your mom’s legacy deserves to be honored—and so do you.

You’re not overreacting. You’re responding to a pattern that’s chipped away at your sense of safety and self-worth. If you’d like help drafting a message to her, or exploring how to gracefully step away from the friendship, I’m here for you. You’re not alone in this.

side note:

*I think Olivia has really changed a lot as a character and not all for the better...but that's for another blog post.