Lots of great articles in today's New York Times...

All of the below are from today's New York Times:




You don't have to live in New York City to appreciate this article about houseguests:

http://nyti.ms/1jXLalI



...

I think a lot of us have done something in our past that still haunts us to this day, something that we long to apologize for, but aren't sure if it would do more harm than good. What follows below sounds like very good advice!


From today's Workologist column in the New York Times:

Question:

About 20 years ago, I served in a management position. I had great employees — but I was a horrible boss.

 

I’d like to write an apology to one person in particular who really stuck out his neck for me, but whom I treated badly. He’s retired now, and 83 years old. I don’t want to upset him by bringing back bad memories. On the other hand, I’d like to tell this man

how lucky I was to work with him, and how much I learned from his example. 

 

Bad supervision can scar the soul. I’d be immeasurably pleased if even one of the managers who wronged me in the past took the time to apologize.

 

Should I let this go or send the letter? MARCIA MACINNIS, MASHPEE, MASS.

 

 

Answer:

I think you should send it. And even if you don’t send it, you should certainly write it.

 

In fact, you may want to write it twice. First, write a version for you: Articulate whatever helps you reach catharsis about your past actions and regrets. Then start fresh or revise the original to send to the person you supervised. No need to dwell and co-workers, on the specifics of your past sins in this version —  he probably won’t need to be reminded. Focus on the apology and the positive effect he had on your life.

 

You seem sincere, and that’s the key: Anything that comes across as contrived or having an ulterior motive would be worse than no apology at all. Just make sure that what you send isn’t overly focused on you; that risks coming across more as self-pitying or even excuse-making, rather than representing real contrition.

 

With those caveats, this sounds like a good thing for him, for you — and maybe for the rest of us. We have all had regrettable moments as bosses and employees, Maybe we need an annual day of apology to all slighted colleagues.



also from today's NYT:

He will always be "Walter" from Fringe to me, but no matter who he is playing, I love him so much!:

John Noble in "The Substance of Fire"

 

Freshman year of high school, I played Michael Damian's 1984 Love Is A Mystery so much my sister told me she knew every word of it even though she could not stand the sound of his voice. I had to buy it from Canada the album was so hard to find in the United States.

Lost and obscure almost from the beginning, Love Is A Mystery is even harder to track down today and a cd copy from Japan will cost you well over $100.

It always seemed to me that Michael Damian's singing style took a turn for the worse when he tried to go more commercial in the late 80s (his cover of David Essex's "Rock On" was his first and only #1 Top 40 hit).

I got to see him at Hammerjack's ages and ages ago and he is one of those singers who is much better live than on a recording. He's a super nice person and though many of his songs from other albums sound very dated these days, much of what is Love Is A Mystery isn't half bad.


Listen here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3kuWPipyEeQ


track listing: Love Is A Mystery

 

 

The Eagles are better for my nerves than almost any other band I love. With the exception of Bach, no other music soothes me when I'm troubled. There's something about Don Henley's soulful voice (especially) that makes me feel things are going to get better. I've always found him more sincere and easier to take seriously than Glenn Frey, though Frey sounds so yearning and earnest on "Lyin' Eyes" and "After The Thrill Is Gone" (where Henley joins him) I like his voice, too.

top ten most underrated Eagles songs

As if there isn't enough out there to read, I keep finding links to "forgotten classics" of the 19th century:

"forgotten classics" to put on your Kindle or Google Play  (English As She Is Spoke by Pedro Carolino is a truly funny read. Buried within this thread are mentions of books that provide interesting insights on how the mind and things like melancholy were once regarded. Those titles are not necessarily classic, but compelling in their take on life.)

20 Classic Novels You've Never Read  

Most of the titles referenced can be found for free in the Kindle or Google Play Books store!

The Missed Connections of their time...

Does your mind ever get scrambled when you think of all there is to do in the world, both what you want to do and what you have to do? All the books you want to read, the sights you want to see, the places to go?

Like many book lovers, I have a TBR list I'm sure I won't finish even if I live to be 99. Whenever I think of all there is to do, especially the exciting things, I'm usually able to snap myself out of my funk.

I just downloaded The Agony Columns of The Times 1800-1870,free from my Google Play Books app. It's fascinating stuff and not only because it's reproduced exactly as it would have looked to 19th century readers but also because it's a collection of columns from what seem to be the Missed Connections of their time. The above is just one of many examples.

The "agony" is supposedly taken from the writer's despair of ever again seeing the person he (though sometimes women would post an ad) found so fascinating, though other ads are more laments or thinly veiled messages that hint at illicit affairs or something from a spy novel. 

Alice Clay's introduction to the book could have been written today it has such modern insight into the human heart. Just one of the passages from her intro:

With hearts that are breaking, men and women can go through the duties of every-day life, wearing calm and even smiling faces. He knew human nature well who wrote 'Broken hearts are dumb or smile.' What is there to tell us that such smiles are only on the surface?

But not all of the ads are missed connections of the first encounter kind. Many repeat names and are mysterious and signed in code. You'd need a degree in cryptology to decipher them.

In one striking ad, someone refers to Cenerentola and writes: Until my heart is sick, have I tried to frame an explanation for you, but cannot. Silence is safest if the true cause is not suspected: if it is, all stories will be sifted to the bottom. Cenerentola is Italian for Cinderella, but it (if you add a "La" in front) is also the name of a 19th century opera.

For a book having an editor, it doesn't offer much source material or any footnotes (marvelous introduction aside!) You have to figure out references and codes yourself (if the codes can even be cracked.)

Despite these problems, you can have fun looking up things or recognizing them because you already know some of the popular culture at the time. There is sadness yet familiarity and comfort in the general malaise of the human condition always present in The Agony Column. Take out the dates and the formal language and you could almost be reading the best of Craig's List.