Monday, October 13, 2014

It's been one of those days that will swallow you up whole if you let it and then I went exploring in iTunes to try and forget and this song was featured under "New From Your Artists." "Sunrising" is so peaceful and lovely. It's almost as gorgeous as their more well-known song "Life in a Northern Town."

I didn't realize a new comprehensive collection of their music had been released in July. It sounds terrific for any Dream Academy fan:


Saturday, October 11, 2014

Fragile things...

My mom used to refer to me as "fragile." She'd especially use this word to talk me out of all the reasons I shouldn't do things or go places by myself, even long after I'd moved out on my own. She'd cite my health issues or what she called my "too trusting nature" as why I needed to be extra careful in life.

Both my parents spent most of my childhood and teen years sheltering me so much that by the time I got to college, I wouldn't have known a third of what the other kids knew if I hadn't read so many of the books I wasn't supposed to or asked my younger, but much more worldly, sister.

I disliked that particular "f" word for so long I only recently saw that being "fragile" isn't always a bad word. I mean, if we were too tough to ever ever break, how would know or care how we, or others, ever really feel? How would we be human? Being more open and vulnerable to things means getting hurt, of course, but it also means experiencing so many beautiful things too...
from appszoom.com








Very few things are more fragile than emotions. When you begin to truly accept that you can't always change some emotions (which should be easy to change since you're the one having them) you finally start to get some peace. Your situation may be that you try and try to stop liking someone but you just can't, so instead you change what you can change about it. And that's not so hard to do if what you thought you wanted (acknowledgement, friendship, forgiveness) is something else instead.

Say, for instance, it was never about that person you like (but shouldn't) liking you back, but about forgiving yourself and hoping they never find out. Instead, maybe, the hardest thing for you was caring for them and knowing you had no right to care....that they had their family and friends for that. I think, if you're going to care no matter what do not to care, that possibly, hopefully, it's okay to silently send good thoughts and wishes (maybe even prayers) their way...




I have had a nightmare the past two nights about something that has never happened to me in real life and yet it was so detailed and scary it still troubled me. I woke with a shaky start and had to think for half a second about where I was. Then I got up and popped a Golden Girls dvd in my tv and I realized insomnia is nowhere near as bad as having a nightmare.

They say our minds can't make up faces in our dreams, but I have trouble believing that since I don't think I've ever seen the person in them before.

These are some of the sources I've tried to see if I can figure things out. Surprisingly, Yahoo Answers is often a good, if sometimes a very uncomfortable source, even though you are rarely getting people with lots of expertise. Ask MetaFilter is also great, not just for life answers, but other things such as music.

As it appeared on answers.yahoo.com:

Your dream can be interpreted in many ways and have many meanings! Here they are:
#1: The dream could be reflecting your overall fears regarding sex. #2: Dreaming of sexual assault or rape symbolizes a betrayal of the most powerful kind. Someone in your world is pressuring you, harming you, forcing you to do things you do not want to and you don't have anyone to turn to for help... And if you do, that person is not sincere with you. Be careful in who you comfy! #3: To dream that you have been raped, indicates vengeful or resentful feelings toward the opposite sex. You feel that you have been violated or that you have been taken advantage of. Something or someone is jeopardizing your self-esteem and emotional well-being. Things are being forced upon you. Dreams of rape are also common for those who were actually raped in their waking life. To see a rape being committed in your dream, denotes sexual dysfunction or uncertainty. #4: Rapes in dreams can mean many things. Obviously if you have been raped then the dream could be taking you back to that moment. Rape sometimes link to sexual feelings in another way. If you are sexually inexperienced the dream maybe about you exploring your own sexual feelings and preparing to enter a sexual relationship. They may also link to issues of trust e.g. can you trust someone to look after your child? But rapes often are just metaphors for abuse and a sense of powerlessness. They may link to people who have lied and cheated to you and taken advantage of you. They may refer to a boss who has taken advantage of you or treated you badly. If no obvious link to the dream appears just try to think about your life right now and what is the bad thing within it?
As I said before, there are many other meanings to your dream... Since you had the same kind of dream 3x already, pay attention to your surroundings and be careful not to say more than you should, even to those you know! Good luck!!!

Other sources and some quotes that deal with nightmares:

http://io9.com/5852410/10-things-you-probably-didnt-know-about-dreams 

(The above link mentions that most people dream about the same things, but I'm not so sure about that...)

 http://ask.metafilter.com/162715/Why-do-I-have-nightmares-every-night

http://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/guide/nightmares-in-adults


“I still get nightmares. In fact, I get them so often I should be used to them by now. I'm not. No one ever really gets used to nightmares.”
Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves

  “Those heart-hammering nightmares that start to lose coherence even as you're waking up from them, but that still manage to leave their moldering fingerprints all across your day.”
Mike Carey, The Naming of the Beasts 

 “You can shoo people away in real life, but not when they force their way in through the dream door.”
Donna Lynn Hope

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Things aren't always what they seem in the latest "Forever," which airs Tuesday nights on ABC, at ten.


Another new show I like is "Forever," which is kind of like "Castle," only less comedic and with a slight supernatural twist.

Dr. Henry Morgan is a medical examiner (played charmingly by Ioan Gruffudd) who studies dead bodies both as a professional living and to help him figure out why he is apparently immortal..."apparently" because he can "briefly" die, but always comes back to life (and, for reasons not explained yet, always naked.)

He is partnered with detective Jo Martinez (Alana de la Garza significantly more at ease and warm here than she was as a district attorney on Law and Order), though the writers have promised (in a refreshing move for tv) to not have them become romantically involved. They are both likable characters, each having had wonderful spouses whom they still mourn and which adds to the genuine feel of decency "Forever" has.

Though the ratings have already started to slide, the most recent episode was the best yet and offered a little bit of old school mystery (a la "Murder She Wrote") to it. The victim, played terrifically by Kathleen Chalfant, appears at a major fundraiser, getting out barbs left and right, telling family and friends exactly what she thinks of them. Minutes later (surprise, surprise) she's dead.

Mean people, after all, always get their comeuppance in crime shows, but was Gloria Carlyle really mean and which of the many people who disliked her had the real motive? Not terribly original, right? Maybe not...but the thing is her backstory connects with Henry Morgan's in a way that is beautiful and sweet without being too sugary or sentimental.

The viewer finds out there was more to Gloria that met the eye and that...well, I don't want to spoil the rest of the episode. I do want to say "Forever" is a solid show that might not be very innovative, but is quite pleasant to watch by On Demand or through a DVR, especially if you're up late at night and need something "escapist" to watch.

Insomnia is no fun, but you can only clean and read so much with all that time, before you have to at least try and unwind in bed.
"American Horror Story: Freak Show"



David Bowie, suit designed by Freddie Buretti
 
Just when I was getting ready to dismiss last night's fourth season premiere of American Horror Story as too freaky, even for me, one amazing scene changed my mind: Jessica Lange singing David Bowie's "Life On Mars."

It's an oddly (very oddly) lovely and arresting 2 minutes and 53 seconds and when she stops singing (starting at 2:40 in the video) the look on her face captures everything we need to know about her character and all her lost dreams. (That and a truly heartbreaking moment when she asks her bearded friend, played by Kathy Bates with a wonderful Baltimorean accent, "is it too late for me?")


from "Monsters Among Us" episode, 4.1



"Life On Mars" as sung by Jessica Lange *


When I first saw this part last night I didn't think her voice sounded very good, but I listened again to the Youtube clip with my headphones and she's actually not half bad, though it's all about the visuals and her expression (oh, can that woman capture expressions.)

I hope her winning an Emmy for last season (a performance that wasn't nearly as good in 13 episodes as what happened in five minutes last night) doesn't hurt her chances for next year. No other actress is so good at playing seemingly invincible, sometimes cruel, women with a hidden vulnerability that threatens to undo them. She did this to perfection when she played a nun (both tormentor and tormented) in the second season of American Horror Story.

Just as Baz Luhrman deliberately went for anachronistic music with "Moulin Rouge" and "The Great Gatsby" so did Ryan Murphy with last night's AHS. This season is set in 1952 and "Life On Mars" was released as a single in 1973.

Jessica Lange singing the lyrics to "Life On Mars" (and the fact "Elsa Mars" is dressed just like Bowie) is the best "freaky" part of the show so far:

It's a God-awful small affair
To the girl with the mousy hair
But her mommy is yelling "No"
And her daddy has told her to go
But her friend is nowhere to be seen
Now she walks through her sunken dream
To the seat with the clearest view
And she's hooked to the silver screen
But the film is a saddening bore
'Cause she's lived it ten times or more
She could spit in the eyes of fools
As they ask her to focus on
Sailors fighting in the dance hall
Oh man! look at those cavemen go
It's the freakiest show
Take a look at the lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man! Wonder if he'll ever know
He's in the best selling show
Is there life on Mars?
It's on America's tortured brow
That Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow
Now the workers have struck for fame
'Cause Lennon's on sale again
See the mice in their million hordes
From Ibiza to the Norfolk Broads
Rule Britannia is out of bounds
To my mother, my dog, and clowns
But the film is a saddening bore
'Cause I wrote it ten times or more
It's about to be writ again
As I ask you to focus on
Sailors fighting in the dance hall
Oh man! Look at those cavemen go
It's the freakiest show
Take a look at the Lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man! Wonder if he'll ever know
He's in the best selling show
Is there life on Mars?

Songwriters
BOWIE, DAVID
Published by
Lyrics © EMI Music Publishing


*The actress has sung before on AHS and in interviews for the second season admitted she's not the best singer, but I think there's a certain emotional "getcha" right at this point(if you see the video):

Sailors fighting in the dance hall
Oh man! Look at those cavemen go
It's the freakiest show
Take a look at the Lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man! Wonder if he'll ever know
He's in the best selling show

Wikipedia has this to say about Bowie's song:

BBC Radio has described "Life on Mars?" as having "one of the strangest lyrics ever" consisting of a "slew of surreal images" like a Salvador Dalí painting.[1] The line "Look at those cavemen go" is a reference to the song "Alley Oop", a one-off hit in 1960 for American doo-wop band The Hollywood Argyles.[5]

Bowie, at the time of Hunky Dory's release in 1971, summed up the song as "A sensitive young girl's reaction to the media". In 1997 he added "I think she finds herself disappointed with reality... that although she's living in the doldrums of reality, she's being told that there's a far greater life somewhere, and she's bitterly disappointed that she doesn't have access to it".





I just saw that iTunes has released Jessica Lange's cover as a single! :)

 
Some thoughts from people on it:
 

Customer Reviews

😍🎶😍🎶😍🎶😍
It's a must buy!! I can't believe this is Jessica's last season in American Horror Story. She's so talented and having this show without her wouldn't be the same.
Jessica does it again!
Is there anything this lady can't do??? Whoever told her growing up that she can't sing definitely has egg on their face today. She rocked out in Grey Gardens, then of course the Name Game. Now she's done it again with Life on Mars. I cannot wait to hear what she's going to sing next.
QUEEN OF POP!!!
Elsa Mars has come to slay and snatch your faves' weaves hunny y'all are not READY for Queen Elsa's music reign. Madonna who? Beyoncé who? Get with the winning team #Martians! Y'all faves better run for their careers, Elsa might not have legs but her talent and slayage will reach and devastate and pulverize your faves so they better start doing cardio cause Elsa is coming for their relevance.